Doctor Freud’s Burlesque Show -#3 Black Ice

“Are you a white man?”
“No, I’m Jewish.”
“Good answer.”
“I’m not to savvy having a white man moving into the neighborhood but a Jew is something else.”
“We are something else.”
“I was raised with the sequel to the Bible, but when I’m down, I pray to God, not the son of God. I like Jesus with his drinking and whoring. He is alright, but I don’t want to have to play a game of “Telephone” between Jesus and God. I want to go to the source…Jesus, could have been drinking and getting his dick sucked when I prayed to him, and then he gives God the wrong message…”
“How do you mean?”
“Well, Jesus don’t hear to well or he is like that Jeanie in a bottle who gives you three wishes, and grants them but they always fuck you up more.”
“How do you mean?”
“Well, when I used to pray and ask things to Jesus, I would say something like,Oh Jesus, Lord don’t let my woman smell the pussy on my dick when I get home… And don’t you know it, I’d get home and my woman insisted on sucking my dick. Now, that was not ordinary for her. So, I got caught with my pussy dick. Now, I’m assuming Jesus heard me say,”Oh Jesus, let my woman suck my dick when I get home… Everytime, I prayed to Jesus, he would fuck me up, but when I just prayed to the Old Testament God, he brought righteous pain upon my enemies. He is a super tough motherfucker. He is like a Marine, and Jesus is more like a Merchant Marine or a do-gooder like the Salvation Army or Peace Corp guy… I like him, he’s a good guy, but he always fucks up what I’m looking for. When I pray to the Old Timer God, he is like a Lawyer and evaluates what I want, and will either give it to me or not. Jesus just gets me in trouble. Are you a religious man?”
“I like the stories, I eat pork and follow none of the dietary rules.”
“Well, I understand. Pork sure is a tasty meat. God didn’t have ovens to cook the shit out of pork when he wrote that Pork Law. Must have been like Charlotte’s Web for the Wilbur’s of the world when that dietary law was written about not eating pigs. Damn, sure lucky Governor’s Pardon for the damn pigs in the Middle East when that Law got voted on and written down.Damn lucky for them tasty oinkers. Me, I still eat Pork.”
“Do you consider yourself Jewish?”
“Uh-uh, I am most definately a black man who just happens to believe in the old man over the kid. I got my reasons. Even the way I am only sort of blind is Jesus’s fault.”
Go on Orville Nettles, tell me how Jesus sort of blinded you.
“I will in good time.”