Chapter 15 – Corpse Sniffing
My Murder Tours Incorporated was growing huge. My name got in the paper involoved with the Serial Ripper and the Office phone was ringing off the hook.
City Officials from other cities were calling and asking us to branch out.
For example, someone from the Detroit, claiming to be part of the Mayor’s Office called,”Detroit has a wealth of great murder stories. There’s the riots, there’s the great mansions. We have a great murder look in parts of the city. We are in ruins. Mansions in ruins. Houses stripped of all metal going to China to build houses there.We have a great city for your Murder Tour company. We would like to take a meeting and show you around.
“Um, Sounds good. I will run it by my partners.”
I didn’t want to tell him that two of my partners were missing. I didn’t want to mention that I was still being stalked by a serial killer, I didn’t want to mention that I was a piece of rotting meat between my wife and my girlfriend.
Instead I said,”Um, sounds good. I will take a meeting with my partners who are on vacation and my wife and my… loved ones.”
“The Mayor himself would like to meet with you.”
“Isn’t he in jail?”
“Not currently. He loves what you are doing in New York and wants you to bring that energy to to Motor City, or should we call it Murder City… Our murders are becoming more ingenious. For example, we just had a madman who incorporated body parts into the engine of his Vintage Caddy.
“Wow.”
“Yes, wow! In no time, we can become murder capital, and you can be there to view it all.”
“I turned to Schlomo, they want us to branch out to Detroit.”
“No brainer,” he said.
I got off the phone with Detroit and turned to Schlomo,”You know if Steve and Johnny aren’t dead, we could become really big tour guides of murder around the country… Imagine, if we could really feel good about ourselves. Imagine us as happy and successful.”
Schlomo said,”Don’t be ridiculous. Now, let’s go find our missing tour guides corpses. It will make a spectacular tour!”
