Menage A Trois -Chapter 14- Notes
We went looking for our annoying friend Steve…
“Why do we care where Steve is?” I asked.
“What are we going to do with our lives, without Steve,” Johnny said.
Schlomo said,”He is an important distraction from my own life. Steve’s fucked up behavior, makes me think my life is good.”
“I sure hope he’s not dead in there,” I said.
Schlomo said,”I am not allowed to see a corpse. I am a Cohen which is the high Rabbi’s. We are not allowed to view the dead.”
“Is that why you didn’t go to your father’s funeral.”
“I couldn’t face that man dead or alive.”
We got to Steve’s apartment and banged on the door enough to get the other tenants to peek out the door.
Johnny screamed,”Anyone know where this knucklehead is?”
No response. He screamed again,”If I don’t get answers, I’ll huff and I’ll puff.”
A little Puerto Rican kid opened the door and said,”He ain’t dere.”
Johhny walked over to the kid,”Where he be?”
“He real gone,” the kid slammed the door shut.
Johnny looked around at the floor and picked up a menu from a Chinese takeout.”
“Good idea, I’m starving,” Schlomo said, picking up a menu from the ground and taking out his phone to begin ordering.”
“Since when are you eating non-kosher food.”
“I cheat all the time,”Schlomo said in a matter of fact tone. “This place has great dumplings. You in?”
Johnny slid the menu he had between the lock and the door,”Watch this?”
Schlomo said,”You can’t break in. I am not going to jail.”
Johnny said,”The only problem with breaking in with this Chinese menu is that in an hour we’ll have to break in again.”
In thirty seconds we were in. Johnny and I stood in the apartment with our jaws dropped.
Schlomo stood with his hand over his eyes in order to make sure that Steve wasn’t lying dead as he placed his order over his cell phone,”Listen, listen, steamed dumplings, Chinese broccoli with chicken,and lots and lots of soy sauce… Guys, can I look, is Steve dead? Can I have the food delivered here or no.”
Schlomo looked around for the first time into the apartment. For the first time since I knew him, he was speechless. Finally, words came to him,”Steve really cleaned up.”
The apartment was broom swept clean. It was totally empty. This was not the dump which we knew.
Schlomo said,”We must have broken into the wrong apartment
